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Dialogue 48​.​1

by Calvin University Dialogue

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1.
Three day old coffee Writings on the wall I do not remember What I did last night at all So teach me what it means to love And I'll teach you to hate Take a lesson from above Learn to appreciate Take me down to where I used to go back to the place I used to know, I cannot go any POTUS hey And I dangled an eternity where I cannot, go back to where I used to go, to go Go We're lost in an eternity All desire gone Breathing in a black hole This is not that fun Tell me what it means to live And I'll tell you not to die Anything that she could give Would bring you to this life (to this lie)
2.
There's a dream I never told you about: I live in a lighthouse now Pacific northwest or in Michigan We'll make these mistakes again and again, and again Every year, the water approaches the bluff Did the dune shrink, the fire pit sink, or did I grow up? There's a song that used to make my heart sink I listened too long, too much, too strong to it I think This is a dream I never told you about: I'm at the cabin if you wanna hang out If you say "Let's" then I'll say "When?" And we'll make these mistakes again and again, and again Every year, I've got new friends to bring I'll turn and speak, to the passenger seat, like I'm practicing Bedroom light, I'm glaring in the mirror At the edge of the trees, where parents don't see, I think on my year You're a dream I never told you I had: In the morning I just feel glad All these things I invent in my head Cause I'll make these mistakes again and again, and again And I'm ashamed how long it took to see: When I'm struck by beauty, it may need not mean a thing. And again
3.
4.
This is a song about my brother We don’t really see each other anymore It was only for a time We were bursting water balloons And building hideouts But things are different now We don’t wrestle each other We wrestle our separate demons And for you things are working out I hear you’ve got some new friends in Grantham And a suit like a senator You wear it well You always were good at arguing I was a midnight reveller I do remember those fights in the morning Scraping nails over scales of your feelings Touching the numb is dumb for the one receiving I may oversell all my genuine demons But I really miss the stars on your ceiling I’m bad at staying close I’m trapped inside my mind But mostly I blow off reaching out Or else I’ll surely fall into a million pieces of salt I’m so in love with the idea of life That there are satellites But they seem so far away I’m sure I would incinerate The moment I touch your skin Benjamin Scraping nails over scales of your feelings Touching the numb is dumb for the one receiving I may oversell all my genuine demons But I really miss the stars on your ceiling I miss running around In gradually expanding circles of time With you by my side I think there may still be toys Buried by the tree Will you dig with me? Will you do with me anything? I’ll lie with the liars I’ll lay with the lame I’ll seed with the dying I’ll change my name I’ll forgive all the times you made me want to scream I just want to count the stars on your ceiling
5.
sitting in the backseat of your car burning through my final cigarette windows open just enough to let the smoke crawl out and it hangs in a receding haze enveloping the immediate past just like you have shadowed what you let go you'll have another i'll cough up blood i can't do this anymore
6.
7.
8.
Last night saw this movie, made life look easy This morning it seems that, movies are unreachable dreams I can’t live every single day without thinking what could be I can’t live every day never being lonely And I’ll see what I can do I’ll find it inside of me…find it inside of me… I wanna be ok with my past No time travel back, Got no regrets And if it was, possible to rewind, I hope that I’d have No need for that. Sometimes I wonder, what I should do in my spare time I don’t wanna waste mine, scramble, keep busy Don’t have a clue what I wanna do Life seems slow enough that you can pick and choose, not true What if I could sit down and think hard enough so everything came clear…
9.
I know I blew the big game The next day church felt the same Coach joked, I must have holes in my hands Just like him, the Son of Man And I'm too small for my brother's shoes My father said it's important to learn to lose And he still bought me a Slurpee that night In the aisle where no one sees Mother says that you cry in bed It's only ever with pride, she said My father's father once said that I've grown We're the same, I've always known Eating at the same place Sunday night 'Cause no one can be adventurous all of the time I took the bat to the back of the woods And I hit as hard as I could And I can't do much on my own But I don't mind being alone I can't be much on my own So I can't wait till I'm grown We're the same, I've always known We're the same, I've always known I'm my bus' last stop to make I get a pop from the vending machine everyday And I'll lie down in the seat and try to sleep off my headache I saw a movie on ABC This small town hopeful finds love and makes the team We joked, that's just what it's like This All-American life
10.
Summer has gone past Where my dreams wouldn’t last Somewhere upon the road Lost my freedom, lost control I know you You're not like this You would never say you love me and then refuse to give me a simple kiss I think I'm I'm in love In love with you I'm in love With the way That you cry When you say That we're through Someday I hope to die A fruitful death, because I don't want my tombstone to say "at least he tried" I hope To touch the sky And sing aloud for all the world to hear and tell each other "look at that boy fly"

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Dialogue Creative Journal
Volume 48 Issue 1

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released December 3, 2015

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Calvin University Dialogue Grand Rapids, Michigan

Dialogue is an arts and writing magazine of Calvin College undergraduate creative work that is submitted, curated, and published by students. This is a catalog of original student music.

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